Written by Tim Cantopher, retired Consultant Psychiatrist and author, and advisor to Dr Morton’s – the medical helpline

See Dr Morton’s https://www.drmortons.co.uk/services/an_depression.php

Written 24 March 2020

Having just returned from my once a day permitted exercise of an hour’s fast walk along the river, I am aware that social distancing and isolation are like chalk and cheese. Tim Cantopher writes here about how to cope with such a difficult situation:

‘These are, for many of us, among the most difficult times we’ve lived through. Self-isolation, while being a necessity to combat the COVID-19 virus, magnifies the fear we are all feeling. The worst-case scenarios, which the media like to focus on, are terrifying and if you’re on your own, you have no way of putting them in perspective. While social contact spreads the virus, isolation spreads fear’.

The keys to emotionally surviving times like these are planning, balance, communication and strategies.

Plan a structure to your day. Don’t force yourself to carry out all the chores which you’ve stored up all at once but do make a plan for spending some of each day doing something useful. Plan time for the other recreational activities which are available to you. Take exercise – this is a powerful antidote to stress and you can exercise anywhere, even in a small flat. Use the suggested one trip into the fresh air for the best exercise you can if you are lucky enough not to have to remain totally indoors. Try to avoid long periods when you just sit and ruminate.

Seek balance. This applies to everything, but particularly to news about the virus

Do ensure that you are properly informed, but don’t spend all of your time reading about the pandemic, watching TV programmes about it or, worst of all, following social media posts from prophets of doom or conspiracy theorists. If you live with one or more people, do talk through your fears, but make sure that you sometimes talk about other things. If you enjoy a drink, go ahead and have a cocktail hour, but don’t let your drinking escalate. Alcohol is a lousy tranquilliser; if used regularly to excess it only makes your anxiety worse. Do keep regular adequate hours for sleep, but don’t spend hours sleeping during the day; that only stops you sleeping properly at night and the early hours of the morning tend to be when our fears get the most out of control. If you need more help with sleeping, try my book Beating Insomnia Without Really Trying.

The keys to emotionally surviving times like these are planning, balance, communication and strategies

Make sure that you communicate regularly with family and friends. Just because you’re cooped up at home, it doesn’t mean that you can’t talk. The phone is there for everyone and I find seeing the faces of friends and family very comforting, so I like to use Skype or FaceTime. If you prefer the written word or electronic communication, by all means use social media. But do communicate and try to have some fun when doing so. How about a FaceTime coffee morning or cocktail hour with friends?

There are a number of strategies which can help you to keep your equilibrium at times like these. A full description of them all is beyond the scope of this article, but you can read about them in my book Overcoming Anxiety Without Fighting it (Sheldon Press). They include Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) (learning how to challenge unhelpful thinking patterns and to alter your behaviours to ones which are more effective). There are a number of CBT smartphone apps available, including Catch It, Fear Fighter and Silver Cloud. Mindfulness is a powerful technique which has been lifted from Buddhist philosophy, involving learning how to experience fully what is around you this moment, rather than your fears and regrets. It also teaches you how to stop fighting with the world, with uncertainty, unfairness and imperfection, but instead to allow things and people to be the way they are. You may find the apps Headspace or Calm helpful in becoming mindful. You need to learn and get good at a Relaxation Exercise. You can find one written in any of my books, or there are a host of exercises available as audio files. Yoga and Transcendental Meditation are effective relaxation techniques. Whichever one you use, practice it regularly and be patient. They all take time and practice to work. Altruism can help you as much as the person you are helping. Who is worse off than you are? Could they be helped by a phone call or an email? This is a time when we need to be supporting each other.

Make sure that you communicate regularly with family and friends.

Above all, try to keep a perspective while you endure your time in isolation. This is not the first pandemic to sweep the world. As always, this too shall pass.

If we can help you at Dr Morton’s you only have to call.